The best way to find your true love, especially as an INFJ, is to look online. It’s easy to look for the right person while maintaining distance in the safety of your own living room. There’s no awkward staring or small talk. All you have to do is upload a few pics and answer some questions. But what platform is the best, especially for INFJs? Well, that depends on what you’re looking for. Let’s explore a few of the popular options.
Tinder
Tinder is the most popular dating app. It’s easy to get started and it’s mostly free, though you can upgrade to a paid plan with more features. The downside is that it has a reputation for being a hook-up app. People use it to meet someone for the day/night without any desire for a long-term relationship. If you’re looking for a short-term thing or you just want to dip your feet in the dating pool without any commitment, this might be just the app for you.
Match.com
Match has been around for a while and had the reputation that Tinder took over. I have some friends who paid for a premium subscription and found someone after a while, so perhaps they have cleaned up their act a bit. Match is also pretty easy to get started with and will get you swiping right and left pretty quick.
Bumble
Bumble was designed by a woman who wanted more control over the dating process. So with this app women are encouraged to make the first move. I used the app for a while, but I really hated it because I am TERRIBLE at figuring out what to say to people, especially first. Even with a simple text message I had a paralyzing fear that kept me from sending messages to anyone. Suffice it to say that it did not work for me. That’s not to say that it won’t work for you. If you can rock a text message to a stranger, you’ll be good to go with this app.
So Synced
So Synced is branded as the personality type dating app. It sounds like a fantastic concept, except for 2 things: 1) only certain personality types are actually deeply interested in personality types and 2) it’s new so there aren’t a lot of people who use it yet. As INFJs, we’re one of the types most interested in personality types, so if you’re looking for another INFJ you might be in luck. But if you’re looking for a type that statistically doesn’t put so much stock in personality types, you might struggle to find someone on this app.
The other thing is that there simply aren’t enough people on the app. Dating is a numbers game, especially when you’re dealing with a worldwide app. Even if there are 10,000 people on the app, if none of them are in your city, state or even country, then you’re out of luck. I’d really have to think about going to a different state for someone, let alone a different country. I’ve watched enough 90 Day Fiancee to know that dating someone from halfway around the world who barely speaks your language is not a good idea at all.
Eharmony
Eharmony is the most involved of the dating platforms. They have a reputation for serious relationships and for asking a lot of questions to get started. I’ve been on Eharmony a few times and I know it takes a while to get set up. You have to be into it to stick with it. Their subscriptions are a little bit pricy too. But again, they want serious people.
My choice
I went with Eharmony for my dating, for now. I want a serious relationship. I’m not interested in hook-ups or messing around. I don’t play games. I also know from experience that Bumble isn’t for me either. I’m more traditional in that I would rather have a guy approach me. I also like the personality matching that Eharmony does. I think it gives you some insight into who the person is before you reach out to them.
When you’re thinking about online dating, make sure you look at all of the options, not just the easiest one. If you’re looking for something serious it may take some more work, but it will be worth it in the end.
I would add that Boo is another great app for INFJs. It's based on MBTI personality matching and I met my current partner through there. We've been together for almost a year and very happy so far :)