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The Persistent INFJ

Updated: Feb 3, 2022

Website issues and what they taught me

I’ve had a rough couple of weeks. I decided to change my website host to a new and cheaper one. It gave me more features for a lot less money. That should have been a red flag, but unfortunately it wasn’t. So I built a whole new website, well three actually, and transferred the DNS. I sound really smart and technical saying this, but really I spent a lot of time on Google trying to figure out what it all meant.

Then the new host went and deleted my sites. Panic ensued. Threats and blame got tossed around like somehow it was all my fault. But I yelled at them enough that they were able to fix it within 24 hours. I thought all was well. I was wrong.

More problems

The next week I started using a new program to help grow my traffic with Pinterest. It worked great, increasing my traffic exponentially. I was so happy for like a minute. Then my website got marked as spam on Pinterest. More panic. More Googling. The next day I got a response from Pinterest, “Oops. So sorry. It happens. Blame AI.” Ok, cool. As long as it’s fixed. But it wasn’t.

The next week my website was marked as spam again. And this time their response took 3 days and it was not as casual. It was more like, “Nope. Not our bad. You did it and you should know why. It’s permanent because your content is spam. Go away.” Super rude. And yes, I am talking about this blog, INFJ Woman. They thought it was spam. Unbelievable.

I was beyond furious. I told everyone I know. And their response shocked me.

“Wow, that sucks. I guess you’ll have to do without Pinterest.” 

I was so surprised how easily they just gave up. It was a canned, almost automatic response from the lowest paid person working at Pinterest. And I was just supposed to accept that was how it was going to be?

Gone again

Back to my website hosting saga… I noticed that my sites were loading super slow, so I went back to the new host and upgraded my plan. And you know what they did? They deleted my website. Again. I don’t know why I was surprised.

I spoke to 6 different people that day, all of whom accused me of deleting a database and asking me if I had a backup. Let’s be clear: I wasn’t even aware my website had a database, nor would I know who to get to it or how to delete it. Also, I’m paying the new host for a code backup, so they should have a backup. That’s part of what they sold me. So they told me it was gone and I wouldn’t be able to get it back.

And I went and told all of my people and again their response, “Wow. I guess you just have to start all over and build it from scratch. That stinks.”

I’m shocked at how many people except “no” the first time they hear it. So I started thinking about how many times I’ve accepted no the first time that I’ve heard it. A few years ago I wanted to start a YouTube channel. I mentioned it to a couple of my friends and they said it was a horrible idea. So without much thinking I just accepted no. I shouldn’t do it. It wasn’t a good idea.

Just one more story…

Just a couple weeks ago I was trying to see one of my favorite bands. I’m sure if you followed me long enough you’ve heard me speak about New Kids on the Block. They’re from Boston and recently they announced that they would be playing a show in Fenway Park this year. Because of that they were going to be at a local radio station one morning. So I went to see if I could see them there, just for a minute. Just to say hi. 

I asked one of the girls that worked there if I would be able to see them and she said, “No. They are coming in on the other side of the building through a locked gate. You shouldn’t even be here. You won’t be able to see them.”

“Ok, no worries.” I responded and went back to my car. But as soon as she walked into the building I went right back up to the door. And you know what happened?

Well that would be Donnie Wahlberg, Jordan Knight and Jon Knight, from New Kids on the Block. Not only did they come in the front door, but they were more than happy to say hi, stand there and chat for a few minutes and take selfies. Really sweet guys. So glad I didn’t leave before they got there.

Why do we just accept no?

I cannot for the life of me figure out why people just accept no. The only reason that I can come up with that I have accepted it at times is that I haven’t always believed in myself or believed that I deserved good things to happen to me. I thought that I had bad luck and I just expected bad things to happen to me. So I accepted those things when they did happen. Like an endless cycle.

The power of manifesting

It seems like I’ve run into a lot of people who talk about manifesting. In short, they believe that you put something out there in the universe, usually by talking about it, and it will happen. You talk it into reality.

I don’t know that I believe that just as it is. I do believe in dreaming big dreams and then believing that they will come true. Part of that belief is a belief in yourself, that you deserve something good to happen and that you will put in the work that’s required to make it happen. I know for sure that there is major power in what you believe. Because when you have enough belief in yourself and what you want, it doesn’t matter how many people tell you no. It doesn’t matter how many people tell you that your idea will not work. You won’t let their negativity stop you. You will find a way to make it happen.

The results

When Pinterest told me my site was permanently marked at spam I protested. I sent several emails to different people asking them what I did and telling them my story. I went through their spam policy and found what I had done wrong and fixed it. The next email I received from them was the, “Oops. So sorry. It happens. Blame AI.” And all was well in the Pinterest world again. Lesson learned. Problem fixed. Site traffic restored.

When my website host deleted my website I again went to the mattresses and fought to the death. And then I gave up with them because seriously, they are terrible and it was a terrible decision on my end to change hosts. But I still had my old website and was able to change my host back to the old one within a couple of hours and all is well in website world again. Thank you WordPress for your amazing service! You really do get what you pay for.

The moral of the story

Persistence pays off. Just because the first person says “no” or “you shouldn’t do that” doesn’t mean that they are right or that they even know what they are talking about. You have to decide what you want and talk to enough people that you get the answer that you are looking for. You have to believe in yourself enough to go after it and to keep going until you get it. You’ll be amazed at what happens when you do. 

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